written works
The Snakebite was quiet. The recent Brigade raid had dealt a horrible blow to the seedy tavern's already rocky reputation, and despite the valiant success in dealing a blow back to those that had reported them, the business was going under. A few dedicated patrons continued to gamble their meager amounts of gold away, but the once lively atmosphere of the den was long gone.Rena reminisced on the 'good days' as she passed through. The Snakebite, at two points in her life, had been both home and hell. There was a sense of comfort that came from being within it's pungent, liquor-scented interior. Beneath it, however, was a raging anxiety. The door to the locked back-room was tempting. She knew what awaited her back there. Often, she wondered if Keres got off on knowing how much that temptation bothered her. It embedded itself deep within her mind, rearing its ugly head every time she came back."Sit down." The given order snapped her out of whatever fond and foul memories she had. Rena nodded, slipping through the gated side-room to find herself a seat. Keres, the bitch herself, sat before her in a chair that was much too large for her lithe, Redguard form. Silence stretched between the two of them. Rena stared, unafraid. Keres stared right back, emotionless. It was easy to be unnerved by what lurked within the Redguard woman's eyes- Frankly speaking, it was because there seemed to be absolutely nothing at all. No emotion. No happiness, no sadness, no fear, nothing at all."You're losing your job." Keres finally spoke up. Much like her eyes, her tone was utterly devoid of any feeling. It was flat, factual, and bordered on being bored.Rena stared. It came as a shock; Even after the drug-bust, the Gryphons as a whole seemed to be doing fine. Perhaps her mistake was realizing fine wasn't good enough.The woman apparently took Rena's silence as a prompt to continue. "Coffers ran dry. This place ended up being more gold than it was worth after the fucking Brigade ruined everything," For the first time, rage made itself apparent within her eyes. Keres brushed it away and continued more calmly. "We've hired more than we can financially support. I believe the lot of you will be getting one last, significantly smaller pay before we close the gates."Keres gave no apology. Rena didn't expect one. "Well, that's... Lovely news." She responded, taking her words slowly lest she say something out of turn. She wondered why she cared. No job, no boss. Keres didn't hold that over her any longer. "Suppose I'll go fuck myself and go back to what I'd been doing. Was fun while it lasted, I guess. What about you?"The Redguard shrugged. "Empty coffers will mean a very, very angry husband. I suspect the moment he knows and starts working to fix it, he'll already have me strung up on the gallows for the vultures to peck at." She leaned back in her large chair, swinging her boots up to rest on the table between the two women. "So I've got two options. Stay and try to patch up what I can and potentially ruin more in the process, or... Fuck off. Disappear. Give it all up just so I can live."Silence persisted again.As much as Rena had convinced herself she detested her boss, the oddest bit of pity slipped into her gaze. She didn't know what answer to offer Keres. At one point, she may have suggested she stay, relying on the slim chance that she would simply die. But now..."You should go."Keres ticked her chin up, gaze neutral. "Why?"Rena couldn't tell if she really cared to actually know her reasoning, or if she was asking for her own entertainment. She answered regardless, "It's a chance. It's better than death, and you can try again somewhere else with someone else.""Just how many chances do I get, Rena?" Her tone was flat as ever, but a hint of grief passed through her amber gaze. Rena wouldn't have caught it had she not been looking close enough. "How many? I've taken three already. Three times I've started from the fucking bottom and built myself again. This was the farthest I've gotten. This isn't going to happen again. Not for someone like me.""Someone like you?" Immediately, she knew she shouldn't have asked.Keres huffed a dry, mirthless laugh. "Someone like us. Those who come from nothing and waste it all just to get something. I had it. I had my little pile of nothing even worthwhile, and I threw it all away, Rena. I threw it all away because it wasn't enough." Rena started to speak. Keres lifted a hand, stopping her in her tracks. "Don't. That's just what you are, too. That's why you always came back."Keres was right. She couldn't even find it in herself to be angry. "So you're just going to give up, then?" Rena shot back. She chose to ignore the accusation. "You love Sivier. If you left, maybe he'd realize where he is without you. You could make something on your own, make him realize-""Do not lecture me on love." Keres interjected. The rage had returned, and this time, she didn't bother to hide it. "I wanted this more than I ever loved him. Now that it's gone, what purpose does that love serve me?""It-""Don't interrupt me." She snapped. She leaned in, bringing her boots off the table and down to the stone floor. "Listen to me. When a starved cunt happens upon food, they'll take it in abundance. They'll eat themselves sick. When people like us want, we want far beyond what is reasonable. If we get what we want, we end up wanting more. More and more until we lose it all gambling on this stupid game of power. That's how you got stuck in your hell, wasn't it? You wanted until you wanted yourself sick, and ended up worse for it."Rena was stunned into silence. She stared at the woman across from her, angry but too hurt to form words. She had many things she wanted to say; You don't know a thing about "my hell". Just because you fucked up doesn't mean the rest of us will. You only messed up because you're a demented sociopath who can't feel emotions like a normal human being. Cheap shots. Beneath it all, however, was the response Rena feared most. You're right, Keres.Keres sniffed. She reached out for a bronze case upon the table and flicked it open. Her supply of moon sugar was dwindling. "That's all I have to say to you." Her tone was flat once again. A lazy drawl accompanied the words as she stuck a finger in the substance, then right into her mouth.Any newfound confidence against her former-boss was gone. Rena knew what those words suggested and she knew better than to question them.The tavern was empty when she left.
Those that only ever knew having nothing were the ones that wanted for everything. This was something Rena had come to know as fact, something repeated into her ears in whispers since her days spent with her family in the caravans. Then, she hadn't known the difference between herself and those that wanted. Then, she hadn't known the cost of wanting everything for someone like her."You're a dreamer," Helane murmured, her fingers raking through Rena's dull, rust colored hair. It was tangled in knots and the older woman began to comb them out gently as they spoke, "You dream of things far larger than yourself. The destitute tend to do that, but you, well... When I found you, you were already stepping on the Path. That sets you ahead of the rest of your kind.""I wanted." Came her response. It was barely a rasp, her vocal chords taut and ruined, nearly gone. "I wanted, Helane, and I lost."Helane clicked her tongue. She stood and rounded the girl before her. She knelt, taking up her scarred hand. Helane was a gorgeous woman, her age a mystery and her creed even more so. Her hair was an inky black, so dark it melded into the shadows of the stone surrounding them, and her eyes similarly so. She was thin and lanky, long-limbed and graceful like an Altmer... But not an Altmer. Her hands moved to grasp the young woman's face gently.Rena was ruined. Flames had ravaged her skin and marred her face, thick, ugly scars covering her cheek to her shoulders until her clothing covered the rest of it. Her hair, caked with dirt and grime, had been ripped in clumps. Bald spots sprouted slow growth in patches, but perhaps that was even worse."You wanted and you lost. It got you here, Rena. The Path you were meant to be on at my side," A cruel smile spread across her lips, "Your body is a canvas that I was meant to paint upon. I will make you into everything you've dreamed you could be. They will listen to your voice again, and when I give you to Him, he will taste your wine and never want for another again."Helane spoke words she often did not understand. Rena did not consider them, her answer coming without hesitation: "I want that. Please, Helane, I want it more than anything else."The two women stood, one leading the other out through a stone walkway into a wider cavern as though they were in a trance. The greater stone hall was filled with bodies, writhing in pleasure and debauchery beneath the light of the Cheydinhal moon fluttering in through a sewer grate. The heat was unbearable, the sweat rolling down their skin in waves, but they did not mind. In more secluded corners, sweat mixed with blood when the most deepest of pleasures came from feeding on flesh.An entranced band played around a primitive shrine of the Prince of Pleasure himself. The lutenist's hands were raw and bleeding, but he did not stop. The vocalist was rasping, deprived of water and food, but she did not stop. The flutist gasped for air with each note, but they did not stop. Soon enough they would die. Another would take their place.Helane had kept her from partaking in the sights before them. They are not ready for you, she had claimed, you will emerge to them new. Patience, my love. Be patient.Patience, she had been advised. Patience to wait for this moment, laid atop a cool table staring at the stone ceiling above. She could see the moon in the corner of her eye if she strained. She hadn't seen the moon in a long time.Helane approached with a scalpel and ink. "I will make you beautiful and new, unscarred and changed. Stay still, Rena.""Even more beautiful than you?"The question went unanswered. Helane began her work, and the screams were drowned out by the endless music of a slowly dying band.The Reachers of the North fancied painting their lambs before they were slaughtered for sacrifice. Their markings were brilliant and beautiful, full of meaning, as were the sheep. They were colorful so that the Gods might take notice, a gift to be delivered on a silver platter. The Gods in the north, more often than not to these savages, were Daedra.She'd read that in a book once.The stone was cold against her bare feet as she stood. A new morning had risen and drenched the cavern in warm sunlight. The band still played. Those that woke early enough continued their wicked feasts. Her eyes landed on the face of the statue of their Prince, and she swore his eyes were only on her.She was gorgeous. Her flesh had been torn apart and redone, the stitches in the form of black ink swirling against her skin. Helane had made something new out of old life, magic of the flesh mixed with blood to birth Rena from fire. Now, unscarred and untouched, she was ready for the altar.
implied adult content
Business and pleasure were lines oft blurred in Rena's choice of career. The City of Scoundrels was full of lonely louses down on their luck, most of which usually found their way into her den for intel on their marks and rivals so that they might grasp desperately at the next rung of the ladder. When their minds strayed from what business she could do for them, they all looked at her the same way; ravenous, greedy, imagining her coat strewn onto the floor while her tongue rolled over their names. They exchanged business for comfort and Rena entertained them - she liked the attention. Morning after morning, someone new would wake in her bed.Most didn't return. She couldn't blame them, really. The realization that the first whore they caught eyes with roped them into her bedchamber was a shameful one, while others imagined her to be someone else, and promptly realized the option they had at home was superior. She'd lie in wait and eventually the cycle would begin anew.Months after she'd placed her roots in Abah's Landing, she found herself in a cushioned couch across from yet another scoundrel. Sharp, Imperial features scrutinized her every move with inherent suspicion. Eventually he shifted to set a burlap pouch upon the neutrally declared table that separated them."You'll do it?""For that much?" She answered his question with one of her own, posed in a silky, rhetorical tone. Calloused fingers swept the purse up in a smooth motion. "Consider it done already. I'll have something for you in a week - Sooner, if the courier is keen on moving his legs any quicker."Her face contorted into a sweet smile. The scoundrel didn't believe her, she could tell; of course he didn't, seeing as her honeyed promises were only promises. Still, he declined to ask for the coin back. Even as he was mulling over the timeframe she offered, his body betrayed him with subtle twitches and shifts towards the door.
"Tavyeli's daughter?"The men spoke far below in hushed tones, as though they were passing secrets between one another despite the fact that they thought they were alone. They giggled like children sharing a particularly juicy piece of gossip among their little posse, muttering beneath their breaths and concluding with chuckles or cruel snickers."Tavyeli, Tavyeli... Which one was that again? Tavyeli the whore?"Another man snorted a laugh in response, "Yes, you fool. Tavyeli the whore. Tavyeli the maid, who got herself lashed for swiping scraps of food... For her daughter. You remember now?"The other snapped his fingers, pointing victoriously at his conversation partner when realization struck him. "Aha, I do! Tavyeli..." He sang her name like a taunt, "And her daughter, whose name never strikes me. Forgettable. What about her, Zul?"Zul, as he was apparently named, leaned forward in his plush seat and lowered his tone. His eyes widened theatrically while his fingers laced together - Oh, this was going to be good. "Apparently our good friend Hasid bumped into her down by the docks early this morning. He said she attacked him like a rabid dog. Almost clawed his eye out with her bare hands. That bitch needs to be put down, swear it."The details were wrong.Hasid asked about Tavyeli. "How is she?" He'd spoken kindly as if he'd cared, "We ain't seen her in some time. Got a new maid to take over, but she ain't nearly as good as your Ma, Saf.""She passed."He donned a frown. She didn't find it sincere. "How? When?"Safiya sniffed, "Ten years ago. Did the job herself. You do not want the gruesome details."Hasid seemed surprised by this revelation. He reached out to place a hand on her shoulder. Safiya flinched, leveling a harsh gaze on the man's face. He didn't move. "I'm terribly sorry," his sympathy looked like dirt in his teeth, "but, you know... You will always have a place with us. You can take up the old maid spot. Pay is fair for what you clean, but we do pay double for any... Extra work you may do."There was no flash of rage that boiled in her veins. No anger, no disgust, not even the slightest twinge in her expression that could've betrayed what came next. Her hands had curled around his forearm, yanked it roughly off her shoulder before the bones of his wrist snapped in her grasp.Hasid screamed. Safiya lurched forward and began swinging. Blood ended up beneath her nails when an onlooker finally yanked her off the poor man and he stumbled away, wailing for his almost lost eye.She'd ended up here. The rafters above their sitting room were high and strong, enough to bear her weight without spilling dust or making a sound. The man below gaped, "Hasid? What ever was he doing down there? Will he live?""Oh, he'll live. Blind in the eye, though. Street rat's dirty nails got it infected. He's lucky they were able to even keep it in.""And the daughter? What's to be done with her?"Zul smiled, "Already got someone on her tail. We won't have to worry about Tavyeli's filthy bloodline again come sunrise."They thought so, but they wouldn't get the chance. Safiya inched back along the rafter silently until her back brushed against a stone wall. Using crevices hollowed by time in the structure, she made her descent quickly and quietly. They didn't know she was there by the time her boots met the floor. She waited regardless."Take her eyes. She shared them with her mother - I would like a souvenir."Slow or quick? She hadn't decided yet. The man that had requested her eyes was not worth the time, little more than a spider to be crushed beneath her boot. She tugged a smaller knife from her belt and leveled it with his neck from behind, then threw. It whistled through the air enough for them to hear, but there was no stopping it when it lodged itself within his nape.Zul lurched to his feet. He would beg for his life, she would make sure of it. Vengeance had coursed through her veins for the last ten years. There were few emotions Safiya properly knew, but anger was becoming a familiar comfort. It stroked her hair in the morning and cooed words of wisdom during the way. Wait, wait. It will come.Now it had. When the job was done, it felt good.Ten hours from now, the satisfaction would fade but the thought of having done something would remain. In ten months, the anger would be gone. It no longer stroked her hair, nor whispered in her ears. In ten years, Safiya found herself with nothing.
